Growing

by Kid Dreamer

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    Track-listing
    1. Truce
    2. When You're Away
    3. Losing Touch
    4. Bad On You
    5. Growing
    6. Who You Want To Be
    7. Gravedigger
    8. Stay

    Includes unlimited streaming of Growing via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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1.
03:16
2.
3.
03:15
4.
03:06
5.
03:38
6.
7.
04:02
8.
03:48

about

All songs written by Kid Dreamer
Recorded at Nutone Studios in Pittsburg, Ca
Produced, Recorded, and Mixed by Scott Goodrich

facebook.com/kiddreamerca
kiddreamerca.tumblr.com

credits

released October 1, 2015

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Kid Dreamer Santa Rosa, California

North Bay
Bad Boy Crew.

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Track Name: Truce
Are you still upset?
I spent the better part of this whole year
As a threat to holding all we that have secure
He said, she said bullshit in my ears
It's all that I hear
And now the space between us grows

I haven't been around enough, yeah I know
But distance is what I chose
It just goes to show
That you reap what you sow
And I'm not solving anything

We're just running in circles
I'd never let you get too far ahead of me
We're running in circles
Hard to see, but I was never the enemy

Have I been replaced?
By a better soul more sincere?
This angst is mounting in my head, its fear of losing what we built here
It's all becoming so clear
That I stood by as the space just grew

I should have told you
When I still had you
You’re the one I'd always choose
Now I'm the bad dude
That used to come through
And I'm not solving anything

We're just running in circles
I'd never let you get too far ahead of me
We're running in circles
Hard to see, but I was never the enemy

I didn't want you to go
And I didn't need you to leave
If you're asking to come home
You know just where to find me

Can we let what's broken begin to mend?
And bounce back to the place that we used to spin?
Call a truce and learn to be together again?

I'll let what's past
Stay in the past
Cause I was on the run
And you were moving too fast
Track Name: When You're Away
Stop trying to insist balance in my head
I just wanna lie here in my bed
I'll fall asleep alone
And miserable instead
Cause you're not worth the effort or the dedication
Go find another shoulder to sink your face in
I’m sorry I had to let go
I needed space to let myself grow

When you're away
I never think of you
Don't think I wanted to
I've made due without you

I can't take any more bad news
I used to hold precedence in you
Now I’m just translucent
And all of my times spent
Hiding off out in the distance
I think I've found my place
But it's not by your side
You’re so translucent
And all your times spent
Fighting off all my persistence

I miss the girl I used to talk to
Don’t wanna see the new face that she grew
Don’t wanna hear about what she’s been up to anymore

It's not so bad I told her
Let's talk again when were older
And In three years will you still hate me?
Even if I'm not the same me?
Track Name: Losing Touch
Bury my heart in the backyard
It’s just gotten so heavy to carry
With all that we are
Oh god I’m grinding down my teeth
I can’t disguise myself or swallow my grief
I feel like I hate everyone and everything
I’m like Holden Caufield I’m
(Wearing my heart on my sleeve)

I’ve outgrown this box
This place it sucks
These people I can’t stand
You used to feel the same
When we used to talk
When you used to know my name

Maybe you were right in thinking that I should stay the night
Cause were losing touch
I’ve been grieving too much
And I dreamt you were a ghost
Haunting this head from my bed post

Oh god, I feel like I’m washing away
(I’d rather die)
Than let these bones dry and decay

I guess I’m not man enough
To stand tall and tough
To catch daggers with my spine
My mother’s death tore me up
I know I’ve had it rough
I think about you all the time

Have you outgrown this box?
This place still sucks
These people you can’t stand
You used to feel the same
When we used to talk
When you used to know my name

I can’t believe I waited up for you
And all shit that you put me through
I let the blood run red and blue
When my shoulders grew
Having to bear you on my own
Track Name: Bad On You
Long time, how have you been?
Yeah I noticed the new ink in your skin
And the pace that you spin
Around all of your fake friends
And all of the weekends
Spent trying not to let me in

And I know I'm twisting nerves
With the knife that you gave me
To bury in the backyard
But I don't ever see you anymore
What's the petulance for?
I'm trying to be better

You're the reason for my dormancy
Because all this fence walking is so new to me

I used to have you
Now I can't place you
I don't wanna have to turn away
If I see your face in a common space and
I feel your eyes begin to stray
I used to have you
Now I can't place you
I don't wanna have to turn away

Cause when I call you're still you
But when I'm home you seem so blue
I know you haven't got the time for me
With the space you need
I just want you know that I'm sorry

You're the reason for my dormancy
Because all this fence walking is new to me

Now you haunt me from afar
And I can't tell who you really are
Just come out and say this
I'm sick of having to face it
I’ve grown impatient
You're the reason for my dormancy
Track Name: Growing
Maybe it's time that
I start to hold my breath in
I think I've learned my lesson
Been counting months and days
I'm getting older while you don't seem to age
I swear I have to get my head straight
And shed all of this dead weight
Or I might just forget you
Fuck it

I can't keep
Falling in love with every girl I meet
I need time
To find myself
(Find Myself)

My brother says
Don't go and lose your head
This is exactly what you wanted
Wish it was you and me instead
If I’m being completely honest

Now I'm
Just a shadow on the wall
You don't even know me at all
I'm Captive inside of you
A victim to the blood you drew
Why do I always have to put up with you?
Would I be at fault if I just withdrew?

Remember wide night skies
Across the Midwest
With your head rested my on chest
It's been a year and change
We’re getting older but I still feel the same
Aaron keeps me up at night but it’s okay
Keeps me sane when you’re away

I can't sleep
In an empty house with
A head full of regret
Eight weeks
Is that time enough to forget?
(Time enough to forget)

Because it hurts too much
To have to call you up
And when you turn and run
I coil up and tuck
Myself back to bed
Is it something that I said?

I wanted to call
Needed to hear your voice
Yeah I'm doing alright
Are you still closed and coy?
I wanted to call
Needed to hear your voice

I’m holding my breath in
I think I've learned my lesson
I guess this is growing up
Track Name: Who You Want To Be
Maybe I'm the one with anger in my veins
Growing out of my skin, I’m embracing the change
Or maybe I'm the one with patience in my veins

How can I get your attention when you’re away?
And in and out of self-decay
But we can be who we want to be
And see the people we want to see
I know that you're hurting
Trust me I'm learning
But how can I get your attention when you’re away?

Maybe I'm the one with anger in my veins
Growing out of my skin, I’m embracing the change
Or maybe I'm the one with patience in my veins

Everything will be okay
Yeah that’s what you always say
You keep pushing your guilt on me
Is that the person you wanna be?
Cause no I’m not mad were through
Just still upset with how much I gave to
Try to reach out to you
Pace backwards from the line you drew
I know that you’re hurting
Trust me I’m learning
Maybe it's something I'll never get
Or the world just isn't fit
For a fuck up like me
Kid of divorce and tragedy
I keep finding myself
Driving outside of your house
With all my windows down, trying to get to you

She took my hand
And she held it into her chest
Said broken boy I wish you all the best
But don’t go running away
From this city you hate just
To Try and escape
The ghosts under your bed
Track Name: Gravedigger
Spent so much time
In the back of the office on a company line
And you're still waking up at noon
And since we fell apart
I feel broken I feel brand new
When I'm out there
And you're still stuck here
Biding time in the town we grew up in
It’s clear, all the ghosts you fear
Disguise themselves inside cheap bottles

I just can't believe
All the kids from high school that didn't leave
Are wearing out this downtown scene
Prom King and Queen are the hometown deadbeats

I don't wanna grow up
And I don't wanna waste any of my luck
I'm not putting up with it
I fucking hate this shit

Lately I've been
Looking our through old photographs
In the box of them under my bed
And I Never cared
To make those moments last
But now I can't keep them outta my head

I've finally dealt with my mom’s death
And I’m feeling better about
Being the son of an angry man
Yeah I do what I can
To take my place in the back of the van

But I just can't believe
That you're fucking anchored at the knees
Like the weight of the world is bound to your feet
Are you waiting for a sign or anything?

I guess I could find my own apartment on the west end of town
Get a real job and quiet down
I could sell all my shit and sweat the rent
Spend my best years in discontent
Is that what you wanted for me?

I think I’m talking to a ghost
All painted up like a person I used to know
Track Name: Stay
When you come over tonight
Let’s stay up late and watch our favorite movies
Will you come over tonight?
Cause things just haven't been how they used to be

I never was any good at being there for you
All the times that you wished I could
No I'm not an asshole
I'm spending most nights trying not to cave in

I know that you're gone
And I know it's my doing
I know I was wrong
And I know you're pursuing
Better things
I just wanted you to know

That I'm not giving up
And when times are tough
A good friend is all I need

When you come over tonight
Let’s stay up late and watch our favorite movies
Will you come over tonight?
Cause things just haven't been
No they haven't been how they used to be

Been sleeping on your side of the bed again
Been fighting the ghost inside of my head again
And it's fine
That you're taking your time
But don't waste all of mine
I’m sleeping on your side of the bed again

And maybe it's a good thing that we don't talk
Cause I'd be hung up on every word that
Falls in and out of my headspace
Maybe I'm trying to fill your dead space

You said we would never bend
And now our friendship has failed to mend
It's not like I'm pulling out my teeth
I just hate what you can't be

I'm not giving up
(I'm not giving up)
When times are tough
(When times are tough)
A good friend is all I need

You and I
We're spinning in circles
You and I
Always spinning in circles

I think we're gonna be okay
But right now I can't match the pace
That you move in
I'd never choose it
But if it's space we need
Everything will work
If it's meant to be
Everything will be okay